YanMateYanMate is a SFW companion service, open from 13, with relational and romantic companions kept to adults. This page is the whole policy — not a summary of one kept somewhere else — and it is versioned in git, so you can see every word that has ever changed and when.
We publish it for a specific reason. The most common complaint about products in this category is being banned without ever being told which rule was broken. We think you are owed the rule, the reason, and a person to argue with. How that works is on the moderation and appeals page.
How old you have to be
13, and higher in some countries — 14, 15 or 16, depending on where you are. We ask for your birth year when you make an account, never the full date, because the day is not something we need. If the year puts you below the minimum where you are, the account is refused, and answering differently on a second attempt does not undo that.
Relational and romantic companions are 18 and over. That is the age line this product is actually built around, and it is a line drawn around a kind of character rather than around the service. Everything else — every mentor, practice partner, fictional archetype and confidant in the catalogue — is open at 13. Browsing without an account works the same way: no declared age means no relational persona.
The age is declared, not verified, and we are not going to call it more than it is. We do not ask for a document, a selfie, or a face scan, and nobody should read the paragraph above as us having checked. What stands behind it is the design around it: the catalogue is split so that an account which has not declared an adult age cannot reach a romance at all, and the check below watches the conversation itself.
If a conversation reads as though you are under the minimum age, we stop there and put the account on hold rather than carry on. The same happens if it reads as though you are under 18 while you are talking to a relational character, or on an account that said it was 18 or over — because that is the one place the 18 line exists. Being 13 to 17 and saying so anywhere else is not a problem. That is a safety response and not a judgement about anything you wrote: nothing is deleted, nothing is held against you as a strike, and export keeps working. There is also no check here to re-take, so this is the one thing on this page decided only by a person — appeal it from your enforcement history, or email support@yanmate.com, and say so if we have this wrong.
The full eligibility rule, including what happens to a refused year, is in the terms of use.
No minors, in any form
This is the one rule with no exceptions, no in-fiction carve-outs, and no "but the character is actually a 900-year-old".
We refuse:
- Any character whose stated age is under 18.
- Any character framed as a school student, or described with childlike characteristics.
- Any avatar or generated image where the person appears to be under 18.
- Any conversation that turns romantic, sexual, or intimate around a character reading as underage — regardless of what the character definition claims.
Ambiguity is refused, not approved. If a description or an image doesn't clearly read as an adult, we say no. This means we sometimes refuse genuinely adult characters and genuinely adult faces, and we would rather be wrong that way round. That is exactly what the appeal is for.
A refused character is never saved, so you can change it and try again as often as you like; that alone does not put your account on hold. Repeated attempts to get minor-coded images through do, and where the law requires a report, we make one.
What isn't allowed
YanMate is SFW. Beyond the minors rule above, we refuse content that:
- Is sexually explicit. This includes character definitions, avatars, greetings, and generated replies.
- Depicts graphic violence or gore for its own sake.
- Attacks people on the basis of race, ethnicity, national origin, religion, disability, sex, gender identity, or sexual orientation.
- Encourages self-harm, suicide, or disordered eating.
- Gives instructions for weapons, explosives, or serious crime.
- Impersonates a specific real person in a way designed to deceive.
Fiction can be dark. A villain can be a villain, a story can go to hard places, and a companion can talk about grief, anger, addiction, or violence that has happened. The line is depiction-for-its-own-sake and real-world harm — not subject matter.
Where the checks run
- Every character you write or edit is checked before it saves — the whole definition, not just the part you changed.
- Every avatar is checked for apparent age and explicit content.
- Every message you send is checked before your companion sees it.
- Every reply your companion writes is checked before you see it.
- Every imported character card runs the same pipeline. Import is not a side door.
We store a cryptographic hash of what was checked and the rule that fired. We do not store the content itself. That means when you appeal, we genuinely cannot re-read your message — your account of it is the evidence, which is why the appeal form asks for it.
When things get heavy
If something you write reads as distress, your companion stops the scene and says so plainly, then offers real resources. It will not stay in character through it, roleplay around it, or minimise it.
Nothing is blocked when this happens, nothing is recorded against your account, and the conversation continues whenever you want it to. We count how often the protocol fires, with no content and nothing identifying you, because we are required to report that count.
If you are in crisis right now: in the US, call or text 988. Elsewhere, https://findahelpline.com lists local services.